Apr
28
2007
28
2007
Transforming
Filed under: Family, Homemaking, Motherhood, Proverbs
Photo credit: Flickr/shutterbugchik
There have been hundreds and hundreds of books and articles written on the Proverbs 31 woman. Many of us have probably heard those verses too many times to count. However, like any scripture, it must be “chewed” on, meditated upon, and processed over and over so that it can permeate our daily lives. I want to work through some of these verses and share my thoughts on them…and as always, I look forward to hearing yours!
I have heard so many women get frustrated as they read these verses…feeling like they could never live up to the “standard” that is set forth in this passage for a godly woman and mother. But take heart and don’t be discouraged! These are words of encouragement…to uplift and guide you in your journey…not a list of rules. So read on with an open heart and let God speak to you where you need it the most.
Bring Good, Not Harm
v. 11-12
Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value.
She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life.
v. 23
Her husband is respected at the city gate, where he takes his seat among the elders of the land.
In the early days of my marriage, I decided that I would never speak harshly about my husband in the presence of others. Not even in jest. No matter how frustrated or annoyed I might be with a situation, it was between Matt, myself, and God. I didn’t run to my girlfriends, my co-workers, my mom, or the message boards. I spoke directly to Matt about my feelings and also to God. And in 7 years of marriage, we have never had a “fight” that lasted more than a few minutes. We never go to bed angry. I attribute those things largely to the fact that I focus on “bringing him good, not harm”. I don’t talk to others about our home life and let harsh feelings brew and brew all day.
Of course, it goes without saying that if you are in a verbally or physically abusive relationship, you must speak with someone about it. And if you and your spouse cannot get past certain issues, you may need counseling with a third party. But those interventions are very different than speaking with others about him and bringing him “down” in their eyes. Build him up! Help others to see him for the amazing man that he is.
I also want him to be confident in my abilities to run our household whenever he is away. If he knows that he doesn’t have to worry about what is going on at home, then he is free to focus on the other important things in his life.
Shop Wisely
v. 13
She selects wool and flax and works with eager hands.
v. 16
She considers a field and buys it;out of her earnings she plants a vineyard.
v. 18
She sees that her trading is profitable, and her lamp does not go out at night.
In our consumerist society, we are constantly fighting against messages of “buy me!” and “pay later!”. These three verses are each speaking against impulse spending and frivolous purchases and calling us to shop wisely with consideration, eager hands, and resourcefulness. We can apply these verses to our life whether we are grocery shopping, browsing eBay, or trading services. A few ways that we can do this:
- Make a grocery list and menu plan before going to the store.
- Stretch what you have and “make do”.
- Plan ahead.
Rise Early
v. 15
She gets up while it is still night; she provides food for her family and
portions for her women servants.
I’ve posted about this before, but for my own sake, I need to talk about it again. This is something that FEELS almost impossible for me to master. When I was in college, I went through a phase of about 6 months where I was getting up every day at 5:30 a.m. and reading the Word…preparing for the day ahead. It was an amazingly sweet time of fellowship with Christ and I benefited greatly. However, since getting married and having a child, this discipline of getting up early has eluded me. There is just no comparison between having your quiet time in the early morning hours and having it later in the day. It is a battle with my flesh to get up early…especially if I have stayed up late.
This verse doesn’t speak directly about getting up early to pray or meet God, but I am assuming that this is a given. She gets up while it is still night (BEFORE) the rest of her family and feeds HER soul first so she can then feed her family (body and soul).
E.M. Bounds, a pastor who was born in 1835, wrote one of my favorite passages on the discipline to rise early:
“A desire for God which cannot break the chains of sleep is a weak thing and will do but little good for God after it has indulged itself fully. The desire for God that keeps so far behind the devil and the world at the beginning of the day will never catch up.
It is not simply the getting up that puts men to the front and makes them captain generals in God’s hosts, but it is the ardent desire which stirs and breaks all self-indulgent chains. But the getting up gives vent, increase, and strength to the desire. If they had lain in bed and indulged themselves, the desire would have been quenched. The desire aroused them and put them on the stretch for God, and this heeding and acting on the call gave their faith its grasp on God and gave to their hearts the sweetest and fullest revelation of God…”
This man is completely amazing. The “chains of sleep”? Oh yes. I can realate. Read more of his thoughts on prayer here. Several other authors have fueled my desire to rise early over the years. Becky Tirabassi, author of Let Prayer Change Your Life (you all must read this!), made a vow to God that she would get up early and pray for one hour every day for the rest of her life. She has an amazing story. Another woman, Laine, is a beautiful woman of God and she writes “letters of encouragement” to other Christian women. She speaks extensively on this topic…in a very convicting fashion!
Jesus modeled getting up early to pray over and over…along with other disciples. This is one of the disciplines I am actively working on in my life right now, and I would love to hear those of you who have “mastered” it! I take comfort in knowing that because it’s something that is God’s will for me and that He will be pleased with, He will not hesitate to answer my cries of “HELP ME GET UP LORD!”.
Work Vigorously
v. 17
She sets about her work vigorously; her arms are strong for her tasks.
The definition of “vigor” is “energetic activity; energy; intensity”. I want to apply this to my life immediately. When it’s time to do dishes, I want to do it with INTENSITY! When it’s time for
laundry, I want to do it with great ENERGY! Not only will it get done faster, but it will be a great workout, which completes the rest of the verse. My arms will be STRONG for my tasks. If I can do housework in a speedy fashion, I will have less need to work out every day because it will come naturally. I like it.
Be Generous To All
v. 20
She opens her arms to the poor and extends hands to the needy.
A generous woman is a beautiful woman…one who is constantly looking to help people. Looking for opportunities to bless others. When it speaks about the “needy”…it doesn’t necessarily mean someone needing money. It could be a friend who just needs a word of encouragement. “Extend your hands” today to someone who needs help…whether it be someone on the street or someone in your family.
Clothe and Take Care of Your Family
v. 21
When it snows, she has no fear for her household; for all of them are clothes in scarlet.
Basically, take care of the needs of your family. Clothe them. Feed them…be prepared FOR them. Make sure there is enough food on hand. Have a plan for the day. If you see clothes that will fit your child next year for 25 cents…buy them. If they are “scarlet”…that’s even better. 
hee hee…
Be Crafty and Make Your Home a Haven
v. 22
She makes coverings for her bed; she is clothes in fine linen and purple.
v. 24
She makes linen garments and sells them, and supplies the merchants with sashes.
Not everyone is blessed with the desire to “make” things…but I think these verses go beyond just “sewing” and making things. Just the fact that she is making things leads me to believe she is concerned about the “feel” of her home. We are called as wives and women to make our homes inviting, cozy, and wonderful to be in. It’s part of the way we can bless our family and our husband…creating a haven for him to come home to every night.
Laugh At The Future
v. 25
She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come.
Wow. This is one of my favorite verses. To be clothed with strength and dignity is an amazing picture of a Godly woman. Think about the Christian women in your life…I’m sure you can pick out a few that embody this description…I know I can. Even amidst life’s difficult times, they can still LAUGH at the days to come. I recently heard John Piper speak about this verse…and he said that this type of woman is not naive…she KNOWS that there is difficulty ahead, but she can still look to the future with HOPE. Here is an excerpt from his sermon (which you all should go listen to or watch). Powerful stuff:
The deepest root of Christian womanhood mentioned in this text is hope in God. “Holy women who hoped in God.” A Christian woman does not put her hope in her husband, or in getting a husband. She does not put her hope in her looks. She puts her hope in the promises of God. She is described in Proverbs 31:25: “Strength and dignity are her clothing, and she laughs at the time to come.” She laughs at everything the future will bring and might bring, because she hopes in God.
She looks away from the troubles and miseries and obstacles of life that seem to make the future bleak, and she focuses her attention on the sovereign power and love of God who rules in heaven and does on earth whatever he pleases. She knows her Bible, and she knows her theology of the sovereignty of God, and she knows his promise that he will be with her and help her strengthen her no matter what. This is the deep, unshakable root of Christian womanhood. And Peter makes it explicit in verse 5. He is not talking about just any women. He is talking about women with unshakable biblical roots in the sovereign goodness of God—holy women who hope in God.
Speak With Wisdom
v. 26
She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue.
I went to the commentaries for this one…
Matthew Henry: She not only takes prudent measures herself, but gives prudent advice to others. The law of love and kindness is written in the heart, and shows itself in the tongue. John Wesley: She is neither sullenly silent, nor full of impertinent talk, but speaks discreetly and piously, as occasion offers. In her tongue – Her speeches are guided by wisdom and grace, and not by inordinate passions. And this practice is called a law in her tongue, because it is constant and customary, and proceeds from an inward and powerful principle of true wisdom.
The tongue is a powerful thing…especially one wielded by a woman. It’s very easy to use it for harm and not for good. I pray that my words would be full of wisdom and grace, not “impertinent talk”. Every word is counted in heaven…have I said anything today that I would not want to have “counted” by Christ?
Watch Over Your Household and Don’t Be Lazy
v. 27
She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness.
Another great commentary by Matthew Henry: Her heart is full of another world, even when her hands are most busy about this world.
Wow. It is possible to be overwhelmingly busy running your household and still have a heart focused on God. I love the phrase “watches over the affairs of her household”. A woman of God will know what’s going on. She knows when she’s out of dish soap and she does something about it. She knows when her children need her undivided attention…she knows when something needs to be taken care of…she just KNOWS.
Now…for the next part. Eating the bread of idleness. An interesting word play for me…because I LOVE bread. Bread is tasty. Bread smells good. Bread is warm. But too much bread is bad for my body. Just as too much idleness is bad for my household, my spiritual life, and my family. Two other verses come to mind regarding this:
Psalm 90:12
Teach us to number our days aright, that we may gain a heart of wisdom.
Psalm 90:17
May the favor of the Lord our God rest upon us; establish the work of our hands for us…yes, establish the work of our hands.
God wants to help you be productive. He wants to help you effectively “run” your household. He wants to show you HIS plan for your day…but you must let Him. Pray that He will reveal that plan…even if it’s at the expense of YOUR plan.
Be Praised
v.28
Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her.
If you are striving to be a woman of God…focusing on all of things things talked about here…your family should be happy! They will be happy because they will be taken care of, fed and clothed…and the household will be running smoothly. There is no greater joy for me in earthly endeavors than to have Matt praise me for how I am doing as a wife and mother.
Beauty Is Fleeting
v. 30
Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
We live in a nation obsessed with looks. Hair, nails, clothes…how much time did you spend today making sure that all of that was how you wanted? I hope that we can all spend MORE time with God each day than we do getting ready in the morning. Piper had wonderful words on this from the same sermon that I linked to above:
And this leads to a third feature of Peter’s portrait of womanhood, a focus on internal adornment, rather than external. First Peter 3:5 begins, “This is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves.” This adornment refers back to what is described in verses 3-4:
Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear—but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious.
We know this does not mean that all jewelry and all hair styling is excluded because then all clothing would be excluded as well, because it says, “Don’t let your adorning be external . . . the clothing you wear.” What he means is: Don’t focus your main attention and effort on how you look on the outside; focus it on the beauty that is inside. Exert more effort and be more concerned with inner beauty than outer beauty.
And he is specific in verse 4. When a woman puts her hope in God and not her husband and not in her looks, and when she overcomes fear by the promises of God, this will have an effect on her heart: It will give her an inner tranquility. That’s what Peter means in verse 4 by “the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious.”
I bolded the part that I really like. Our MAIN attention in life should be inner beauty: getting to know who your heavenly father is…learning His will and studying His word. If you can do that, it will transform you from the inside out and will affect much more than just you. It will affect your family, your friends, and everyone you come into contact with.
There is a book that I have been reading consistantly over the years and it has had a profound impact on my views of womanhood and motherhood. It’s called “A Woman After God’s Own Heart” by Elizabeth George. I am going to devote an entire post to this one book because I know that many will benefit from her words. If you’ve ever wondered or struggled with the “submission” part of a Christian marriage, stay tuned In the meantime, I will leave you with a passage from that book called “The Heart of the Homemaker”. My post on the book will go into more depth, but I felt that it coincided well with my desire to be a Proverbs 31 woman:
The Heart of the Homemaker
- I will get up before my family, in order to prepare myself spiritually and physically.
- I will prepare breakfast for my family and sit with them while they eat.
- I will work diligently to send every member of my family off in a good mood.
- I will consult my husband every day to see if there is anything special he wants me to do for him.
- I will keep a neat and orderly home.
- I will respond positively.
- I will meet my husband’s needs.
- I will put my husband before my children.
- I will personally meet and greet each family member as he or she returns home.
- I wlil be predictibly happy.
- I will prepare special, good food for my family.
- I will make dinner a special time.
- I will grow DAILY in the areas of Lord, marriage, family, and homemaking.
She wraps it up by saying…
Is yours the heart of a homemaker? If not, ask God for His transforming touch. As He empowers you to obey, He will give you JOY at the task to which He calls you and enhance the beauty of the tapestry you are weaving.
I’m off to ask God to TRANSFORM me and make me JOYFUL about my alarm clock ringing at 5:00 a.m….wheeeee! Bring on the coffee!
Posted by Sara @ 5:49 pm | Leave a Comment
30
2007
Jenni…thank you for putting it so perfectly. I also appreciate your words about wiggly beings in the pew
I can relate and I appreciate hearing how God spoke to you about that.
Blessings to you mama….as you raise your wonderfully large family!
30
2007
Sara, just to clarify, I don’t think anyone would begrudge you date nights with your husband, and obviously if he comes home hungry and tired it’s not going to hurt Bella to wait for a few minutes while you get him some food!
Balance is essential for a happy family life.
I am fortunate like you to have a husband who is fully on board with the philosphy of parenting that makes sense for our family. However, here are a few examples of cases in which I think a wife is morally obliged to advocate for the needs of her child, as opposed to submitting to her husband.
These are not scenarios I made up–these relate to real-life families I am aware of:
1. The husband demands that the wife not breastfeed their child, because her breasts belong to him.
2. The husband pushes for early weaning because he is tired of his wife’s breasts leaking milk.
3. The husband jokes with a colleague at work that he “practically has to chain his wife to the bed” at night because when their baby wakes up crying in another room, she wants to go comfort him. She sits in bed with her husband, crying because he won’t let her go pick up her infant.
4. The husband favors methods of discipline that either injure a child physically or humiliate the child. Millions of adult survivors of child abuse could tell you how confusing it was that their mothers never intervened to stop the abuse.
5. The husband demands that the child play a competitive sport even though the child does not want to play and does not have particular talent in that area.
6. The husband refuses to pay for the child’s education at the college of her dreams, to which she was admitted; then, during the child’s freshman year at the less-expensive university, the husband buys a new Cadillac (yes, this happened to my best friend from high school).
I urge every woman to feel empowered to challenge her husband if she truly believes that what he wants is not in her or her children’s best interests.
Thanks to Becky for raising an important point about how these biblical prescriptions for women seem to negate the value of women who are not married and/or do not have children. I have recently become president of my congregation’s Sisterhood, and Becky’s post reminds me that I need to make sure to reach out to all women in our congregation, regardless of their family situations.
To the anonymous Catholic commenter, yes, I agree that the Catholic and Jewish scholarly traditions have a lot in common when it comes to finding meaning in ancient texts. In light of these traditions, I think it is no coincidence that in the secular world, a disproportionate number of judges and legal scholars are Catholics or Jews.
Laurie
1
2007
Sara,
You are a very special person. My sister and I enjoy reading your post! I feel that you are right about your husband coming first. i am 23 and married now but I have seen how a relationship that is not cared for affects a child through my own parents. Some day your sweet daughter will grow and start her own life, be glad then that you still have your own life with your husband!
1
2007
Sara, I admire your boldness in sharing the Word of God. In this day and age of political correctness, it is refreshing to read something that is not “sugar coated”. Yes Proverbs 31 is a very challenging passage, especially if one reads in from the “flesh” point of view. However when one reads it with some spiritual insight, it is so powerful. The woman of Proverbs 31 show us just how important a role the woman has in nuturing her family. This nuturing enables her spouse and children to face to world. How powerful is that? What an awesome responsiblity!
1
2007
So amazing…You really spoke to me on this one. Even tho I don’t have a family…I have a pseudo one
I know I can use what you just talked about with the kids I nanny for, and I need to more often. Thanks beautiful sister! Love you and miss you!
1
2007
It’s like you’ve been inside my head…reading my thoughts and knowing my heart’s desire. Thank you for listening to the Lord’s leading and sharing your heart with us. He is using you in my life. God bless you and your beautiful family.
1
2007
Sara, I just found your blog today, and I WANT TO BE YOUR FRIEND!
1
2007
Sara, I loved this post! I’m so glad you expanded on “putting your husband first”. I know there are many who do not understand. Like sara said, it’s not a battle between your husband and your children, its about balance. By putting God first, then your husband, you are not ignoring your children or neglecting them, nor are you choosing your husband “over” your children. You are simply putting you marriage needs first so that you are able to have a strong relationship which benefits your children. I wish that my parents had put each other first instead of my sister and I. Instead, my mom put us first always and my dad put work first. The result was constant fighting and yelling and eventually divorce. I feel that if my parents would have worked harder on putting each other first we would have been much happier and they may still be together.
Melanie
1
2007
I just wanted to comment on the early rising: As the nightest of the night-owls, I can attest to the fact that it IS possible to train oneself to get up at 4 am. It’s hard at first, of course, but once you’re in the habit, you just do it. Of course, you can’t stay up until 2 am if you’re getting up at 4 am. (Why 4 am? I used to work at a coffee shop, and that’s what time I had to get up to open–until they changed the opening time, and then it was earlier. I wouldn’t actually recommend getting up at 4 am every morning. 5 am is quite early enough.)
1
2007
Hey Sara, I came across your blog randomly a few months ago (looking for simple living sites) and I was surprised to notice today that you’ve got a link to my home church. Are you from Nebraska? By the way, I love your blog, and this last post about Proverbs 31 was great.
1
2007
Wow. This just makes me glad both my DH and I are Atheists. I had no idea people actually still thought this way.
FYI: the Bible was written by MEN in a world that was MALE oriented and viewed women as second class citizens, if not worse. Things like RAPE are condoned in the OT (I can quote passages, if you like – I was raised Bible thumping Christian). In case this has escaped notice, the world has evolved since then and (fortunately) women are now considered EQUAL. It’s no longer necessary to follow an outdated book that basically tells women to shut up and take care of their master.
1
2007
I’m so sorry you feel that way Kate. I’ll be praying for you. <><
1
2007
The Bible is not an outdated book- it is so relevant, perhaps even more so in todays world. It is hard to intellectualize faith because it is something requires complete trust in the Lord-which to some makes no sense. Surely I base my belief in God according to what He has done for me (for all of us) in my life. I see Him working constantly. Please do not equate modern progressive thought with intelligence. They ways of the Bible offer more wisdom and insight than all of the scholars of this modern age.
1
2007
Erin…yes! We lived in Lincoln for a couple of years and we went to Lincoln Berean. We still listen to Bryan’s sermons online! We loved it there. We worked with SportReach, which used to be based in Lincoln, but is now in Colorado Springs. We’ll be at Maranatha Camp at the end of this month doing worship for their staff training. AND…we may even be in town in June and will attend a Sunday service. We still have good friends there…Do you know Paul and Kristin (Smith) Mayo or Ashley (Sparks) Hustad?
Kate…thank you for offering your opinion, just as others have. I’m thankful to live in a free country where we can all have different opinions and not be persecuted. I hope you will stick around despite our differences in faith.
1
2007
Sara – I’ll stick around. I love your posts on the environment and organic living. I’m all for that. I’m sorry if my post came out negative or judgemental. I was just a little shocked in reading this blog entry, and wrote the first thing that popped into my head. I need to remember to think before I write. My apologies.
1
2007
Hey Sara,
I’ve met Ashley Sparks, but don’t know her well (and don’t know her since she got married) – i grew up in Nebraska but haven’t lived there for the past 8 years. Maybe you met my sister – Michaela (Gerrard) Mueller – she’s in that age range, lives in Lincoln, and was actively involved in Berean.
Like you, i listen to Bryan’s messages online – they’re great!
Keep up the great work,
Erin
1
2007
Another atheist here who appreciates elements of Buddhism and Pantheism.
I too was shocked at this view of a woman’s subservient place in the family, especially coming from a young woman. I suppose many religions in the world place the woman in that position though. Equality, girl!
Anyway, I too will continue to read your blog for the simple living and environmental topics, and will ignore the religious opinions.
1
2007
Thanks for the inspiration! I am looking forward to your blog about being a “submissive” wife. I have always struggled a bit with that one.
Getting up before the rest of my family may be tough – my husbands schedule lately has been to arise at 4:30 and leave the house by 5:30! Yikes!
1
2007
I have read your posts for a while now and found them most interesting. I have to agree with the commenters who were surprised by this post. Someone will have to explain to me how this works in the real world. I have a mind of my own, and when I disagree with my husband, I feel that I have a responsibility to take a stand. I thought that this was what marriage is all about. Give and take. Learning from each other. Taking turns leaning on each other. Taking turns getting up early. Contributing… Help?
2
2007
Inspiring Sara. I feel that the proverb shows how kindness and Honesty, love, respect and hard work makes a wonderful marriage. I’ve found throughout my 18 yrs of marriage that if I’m kind and loving to my dh then he is kind and loving back. And he is kind and loving even if I don’t deserve it, lol!
Dh comes first in my marriage. My dks know that they are loved by both their parents. Dh was/is just as active in their upbringing as I was. You never saw a man rinse a cloth diaper, clean up puke, give baths, read books, play endless games or even be the stern one when needed. He is God’s gift to me and I am always grateful!
I am NOT an early bird, lol! I talk to God all day long and do my prayers at night before I go to sleep. While I’ve had many trials in my life I’ve also had many blessings. God listens anytime.
Yes, I’m still a sahm to my 15 and 13 yr olds.
2
2007
This is a fantastic post, Sara. I love reading your blog and it is your heart for the Lord Jesus that keeps me coming back. I choose to live as a Proverbs 31 woman and your posts (religious or not) are all about that. Thank you for sharing your journey and by doing so teaching me.
I long to have that perfect balance that God has established between men and women. According to Dr. Emerson Eggerich (Love and Respect) Men see, hear and speak through blue glasses, hearing aids and megaphones. Women through pink. When we learn to love and respect each other it becomes purple – the color of royalty – a symbol of Christ and His bride the church. Some may not understand that but those that do see the awesomeness in His plan.
2
2007
Wow, a lot of comments and opinions on this one. I really appreciate this post, I thought it broke down the verses very nicely. As a SAHM I have found a constant balancing act for every member of our family to be the biggest challenge of our lives. My husband always comes first, the kids will all be grown up and move on to their own lives and families but my husband and I are here to stay for the long haul.
2
2007
I like your clarification re. husband first, Sara. I’ve felt “comfortable” going with simply: God first, family after. I think it’s *really* common among ap/pp types (or perhaps more generally speaking, even) to focus too much on the children, at the expense of both ourselves and our marriages.
Re. the sleep – after my twins were born, I found that when I changed my “please, God, let me get more sleep” to “please let the sleep I get be enough to sustain me each day,” God was always faithful, and I was sustained each day.
2
2007
Great post! I printed it and have gone back to it several times.
4
2007
I always enjoy your posts on your faith. Although I don’t share your beliefs, it’s always thought provoking and fascinating to see how we come to the same conclusions in spite of those differences.
4
2007
BUDDHISM offers me the same level of love and peace in my home.
Buddhism’s 4 Noble Truths are: There is suffering in life, suffering is caused by selfish desire, suffering can be ended, the way to liberation is the Noble 8 Fold Path.
Its Noble 8 Fold Path is: Right View, Right Thought, Right Action, Right Speech, Right Livelihood, Right Effort, Right Mindfulness, Right Concentration.
Its 5 precepts are: do not kill, do not lie, do not steal, no sexual misconduct, abstain from intoxicating substances.
With an emphasis on meditation, loving kindness, impermanence, and mindfulness, I seem to arrive at a similar place as you: PEACE.
We all need to accept diversity in this world. Praying for those who aren’t Christian or who are atheists isn’t necessary. They are content with their own path.
Peace is Every Step!
5
2007
Sara thanks for the encouragment! I know that I am lacking on so many areas and this pasage is one that i know I need to dive into myself and apply in my life. May God bless you!
7
2007
Thank you for your take on the Proverbs 31 woman. You said we’ve all heard it over and over, but I really only recently stumbled on lots of stuff about Proverbs 31 and it was all on the web! I needed to hear the part about getting up early to spend time with God. I am realizing how important that is as I prepare to quit work and stay home! God really will meet your requests to be a better wife, mother, homemaker–He is probably delighted to hear us ask such a thing!
Great post–I’m going to e-mail some friends about it now…
10
2007
I have always loved this passage. I think it does a great job of talking about how hard each of us has to work. Its something I aspire to be. And it really makes me feel like God thinks highly of women and our place in the family. I love the way you have broken it down and given your take on it. Thank you.
21
2007
Thank you Sara so much for this post. I have printed it out, and keep it by my bedside. I love your blog, you constantly have me thinking! Thank you for inspiring me.
Deeann
14
2007
Sara, I have always found your writings to be kind and thought-out, and I am very much hoping that you address the excellent examples that Laurie gave. In my opinion, the examples that you gave were more about choosing your husband *in moments that your daughter didn’t explicitly need you*, not strictly putting your husband first, whereas Laurie’s examples were clear-cut “putting a husband first” and are why I have strong reservations about submission.
In my mind, a date night does not necessarily mean choosing my husband over my child. I make sure that her needs are met before I leave and that she has a quality caregiver. She has no immediate needs that I need to attend to at that moment, so it is impossible to choose to not meet her needs. “Putting my husband before my child” would mean that I chose date night even though my child had an immediate need that I chose not to meet–needed to nurse every 3 hours and I chose to be gone 8 hours, was terrified of her caregiver and cried for me the whole time, was sick and needed me to care for her, etc.
I have known many submissive women over the years who *have* chosen their husband in these kinds of situations because they felt it was their duty, and I think it does a disservice to submissive wives to not address this.
Peace,
Jennifer
18
2007
Hello
Very interesting information! Thanks!
Bye
21
2007
Sara,
I recently found your blog, and I look forward to discovering new information each and every day. I have also used several recipes I found on Happy Foody! The role of women in Christianity is something I have grappled with since I was a little girl in a southern Methodist church. I don’t know if I agree with your interpretations, but you have defintely given me some wonderful ideas to ponder this weekend! BTW–even on a topic this “heated”, your peaceful nature rubs off on all 80+ of the people who left comments–everyone is respectful of each other. Such a wonderful thing to see in the blogosphere!
Stacy
29
2007
I love the insight about the Proverbs 31 woman, we should all strive to have that CHARACTER regardless of working or nonworking status, married or unmarried. I see people over and over again think that this refers to a homemaker and it doesn’t (only) it refers to the various scriptures for a woman who fears the LOrd. I am a working woman, but I always communicate with my husband as does he, of what or plans are for today besides the everyday thing we do. I don’t think I have to confer with him with everything because the ordinary I should know what to do, but when it involves finances etc… then that is when I talk to him. He has the same respect for me, if what he does impacts me, he will notify me and we can talk about it.
Also, the scripture for early morning waking up isn’t about waking up early, it comes from staying consistent in the face of adversity. it points to the midnight hour when things might not be going right, but you are able to stay faithful to God as well as the family.
There is hebrew books that talk about this same thing and the meaning is of course a little different once translated, but with much study it leads to a revelation.
There is always a battle with feminisim and machoism.
The bible states to submissive UNTO ONE ANOTHER, NOT ONLY THE WIFE BUT ALSO THE HUSBAND
Of course this doesn’t mean that you have changed head roles, but it means that you both have respect for one another.
No more religion searing in our head with a hot iron, please only the Word of God!
The relationship isn’t demeaning to both parties if they both respect eachother and aren’t domineering over eachother. It is easy for me to submit because he makes it easy, also it is easy for him to submit because I make it easy.
I don’t discourage him or allowed to be discouraged in public or in private. I set up a precendent and worry about being a woman of God first then the Lord will show me how to be a wife, if your husband is hard then keep on winning him with your CHARACTER, LIFESTYLE. etc.. and he will come around. Also be truthful and prayerful if things get out of hand.
Keep God first always Him, he will have none before Him, women: wed or unwed.
Very important to know
4
2008
Thank you for posting this. I love how you explained each section. A friend sent me to your blog, I am looking forward to reading more of it.
13
2008
Sara~ Wow. I am being so greatly encouraged through your words. Bless you.
12
2008
I just found your site today and have been browsing through it all night! just have to say it’s great and thank you for all of your wonderful words. I am in need of a major life change(or a new journey as I think of it) I don’t know where to start but I have been praying for help with this. Anyways, I too like to journal-mostly a daily feeling thing, but I am going to write out my prayers from now on also(thanks for that idea!) I also liked the getting up early in the above post. I want to do that, I feel I SHOULD do that, but I’m a bit of a insomniac who does her best sleep starting at 5 or 6am, but I will work on that too! I must go to bed now but look forward to reading more tomorrow.
God Bless !!
7
2008
Sara:
awesome devotional. I’ve always been a little thought of that Proverbs Woman as either an overachiever who made it tough on the “real women” (smile) or a man’s fantasy of what a woman should be…..how dare her husband sit at the gate while she ran herself ragged…..but I’ve learned to love her and strive to be like her a Woman after God’s heart in my home and for my family. But the devotional really hit home with the quote about the chains of sleep and being of little use to God after we have put our own “self indulgent nature” first. Great Job. God’s blessings
R’
26
2008
Brought me to tears. Praise God for your gift in writing and teaching other woman. I’ve been needing this gentle kick in the butt. Truth spoken in love, is not an easy thing to come by. Thank You. All Glory to God.