Archive for the 'Family' Category

I remember waking up on this day exactly 10 years ago and being so full of excitement. All of our friends and family had come up to northern Minnesota to celebrate the commitment Matt and I were about to make. The food was ready. The church was being decorated. I felt amazing.

The day went off without a hitch. I still remember the feeling I had as the doors opened, and the music swelled…my daddy holding my arm as he walked me down the aisle.

There was such hope and anticipation in that day, for the weeks ahead, and for our lives together. I look at this photo of us and remember the giddy feelings we had when we were together in those early days…and we still feel that way! We’ve experienced more life TOGETHER than many couples do in a lifetime. I am so thankful for my sweet Matthew and on this day, we celebrate 10 years of bliss together.

Our friends thought we were crazy when we told them we were getting married after knowing each other for one month. We were crazy then, and we’re STILL crazy. Love you!

Photos from our wedding day here.

Sweet Bella,
Six years ago today we welcomed you into our lives. Little did we know how you would change us, inspire us, and teach us. You have brought us joy in so many ways. Your questions, your smile, your fiery spirit…you are a miracle. We love you as high as the sky!

Love,
Your Mommy and Daddy

The Homebirth of Lucia Mae from Sara Janssen on Vimeo.

Nothing could have fully prepared me for the emotions that washed me as we welcomed a new little person into our family just four months ago. Before she was born, I tried to imagine what it would be like…but that amazing moment when she took her first breath and was finally HERE..that’s when I truly grasped how my life has been forever changed.

On the morning of May 29, I woke up at 5am with a few contractions. I laid there for about 2 hours, timing them and wondering. Around 7, I decided that this was it and we started to make the preparations for birth. Matt filled the tub, I got my “birthing clothes” on and we called Rebecca, our midwife. She said to call her back when the contractions were coming closer together. Bella hopped into the tub with me for a little scuba diving practice and we had some really special “last moments” together as just us.

Around 10:30 a.m., we called Rebecca back and things were starting to progress. I had been walking around the house, chatting with my mom and dad (who arrived from Iowa 2 nights before), walking out to the ally and back again. I would stop to have a contraction, and then keep going on with what I was doing. But by 11am, I felt like I needed to be more focused on each contraction, so I went in the bedroom and sat on the birthing ball.

The ball was my best friend. My contractions were low and in my hips/back. It felt great for me to bounce and put my hands on my hips during each one and press down hard while I vocalized. However, when anyone else tried to take over the task of pressing on my hips, it HURT SO BAD. So, after swatting both Matt and Rebecca away from me, I went at it in solitude.

I could feel myself slowly slipping into a laborland…a blissful state where the only thing that mattered was seeing my baby. The contractions continued to intensify. Rebecca and her assistant, Katie would come in to check the heart tones, but they never checked dialation per my request and all I can remember Rebecca saying was “you’re doing great…keep doing it”. They would occasionally offer me some Recharge to sip on (oh my word…I love the grape flavor!) and a cool wash cloth for my forehead. Most of the time, I was completely unaware of who was in the room and even fell asleep between contractions toward the end. I would wake myself up when I heard snoring…and then I would laugh. ☺

I had spent the last couple of days prior creating my perfect birth musical playlist. At some point in labor, I demanded that it be turned OFF because it was annoying me. So much for my baby entering into the world with the voice of Jason Mraz crooning in the background.

One thing I remember from all of my prenatal appointments with Rebecca was that we should have have “no expectations” of the birth experience. She reminded me to just go with the flow and listen to my body…and this is one of the many reasons why I love her so much.

From the moment we met Rebecca, we knew that she would be a perfect fit for our family. She is kind, compassionate, intuitive, and she truly respects the birth process. She is incredibly knowledgeable in so many areas…we felt confident that we could bring any question to her and she would have the answer. She empowered ME to trust my body and let birth unfold in the way it’s supposed to. The best part…we didn’t just gain a midwife in this process, we gained a friend for life.

I chose to focus on the word “open” during my labor…I never said the entire word out loud, but I would say “oooooooohhhhhhhhhh” in a low and loud voice whenever a contraction would come on. It was the best pain medication EVER. As soon as I stopped vocalizing, the pressure would get stronger.

Feeling Lucy move down through the birth canal was the craziest feeling…with every contraction, I could feel her get a little closer to emerging. I never “decided” to push…my body just did it on it’s own and when I felt myself wanting to bear down, I just went with it. There came a time when I knew I must be in transition because my internal voice was saying “Wow…when is this going to be over? It hurts.” And as soon as I thought that to myself, I was glad because I knew it was close!

At this point, I sensed a shift in Rebecca…and she asked Matt if he wanted to catch his baby. That question quickly snapped me out of la-la land and I was ON IT. Let’s DO THIS! I reached down and felt Lucy’s head emerging. My waters still had not broken.

On the next contraction, I felt her crowning and remember my voice getting higher…I looked at Rebecca and she reminded me to stop pushing and make the “puh puh puh” sound with my mouth to slow down the crowning and avoid tearing. And then…she was born. Her head “popped” out along with the water sac, and I felt and immediate sense of relief. I reached down and felt her head and on the next contraction the rest of her body slipped out, into her Daddy’s hands and she was placed on my chest. 2:59 p.m…a miracle is born.

There are no words to describe that moment. She was here. She was perfect. I counted her fingers and toes and grinned from ear to ear. Bella was in charge of announcing if it was a boy or a girl…but the cord was blocking the view and made it look like her was a boy. When we finally realized it was a girl, I was in SHOCK! I was sure it was a boy the entire pregnancy. I had random old women in Costco coming up to me to tell me I was having a boy. Along with every other person in my life. We had an entire dresser full of little boy clothes with not one pink onesie in sight. And yet, her SHE was. A sweet little girl. A sister for my Bella. Oh what joy filled my heart.

We announced that her name would be Lucia Mae…Lucy for short. The rest of the afternoon was a blur of snuggling, calling, smiling, crying, loving…I nearly drove my mom crazy because I wanted to be the one to tell my four siblings the news. I was waiting until things calmed down a bit before I called…but she could hardly contain her excitement. ☺

The night before I went into labor, I had a dream. In the dream, I walked through an open door and my Grandma was standing in front of me with her arms outstretched. She was vibrant, healthy and smiling. She embraced me. As we held each other, she whispered, “It’s ok…it’s time”. I stepped back from her and then she was gone.

This dream came just one day after her funeral back in Iowa. A funeral that I could not attend…being that I was about to give birth. It was devastating for me to miss saying goodbye to her…and yet I felt her presence with me so strongly those last couple of days before Lucy was born. She was still there with me. And even as we said goodbye to Baba…we welcomed a NEW life into the world. The incredible circle of life and death.

It was such a blessing to have my mom and dad at her birth…they were able to be at Bella’s birth as well. They drove straight to Bozeman from Iowa after the funeral and I can only imagine the emotions and stress that they were going through….and yet they drove 16 hours to be with us. I will always treasure the memories I have of my mom and Bella as they watched Lucy join this world…and of my dad as he patiently waited in the living room as his first born child became a mother once again.

It has been quite a transition to add a second child into our family after 5 years of just one…and yet it’s the most wonderful thing that we’ve done thus far. The depth of our relationships with each other have changed and grown, and watching Bella with Lucy brings me to tears.

Lucy is now 4 ½ months old and is changing every day. She laughs out loud and her sister’s funny faces. She chews on everything she can get her hands on. It seems her legs have a new roll on them every time I change her diaper. She loves being in the Moby and the excitement that overtakes her every time she realizes she is about to nurse is just too wonderful.

We can’t imagine life without her…and can’t wait to see her little personality emerge. God is good.

Photography by myself and Alicia Caine
Midwifery Care by Rebecca at Green Midwife

Songs:
The Story by Brandi Carlile
Lullaby by the Dixie Chicks

If you are having trouble viewing the Vimeo video, it’s on YouTube here as well.

Alicia is at it again! We had Lucy’s newborn photo shoot and of course, these just melted my mama heart. I am so blessed to have such a wonderful and talented friend who can capture these early moments in a completely amazing way. I will treasure these forever. Our full family session is now uploaded as well…click here to see us in our pre-Lucy days Oh how I love them! Also, be sure to go check out Alicia’s site and blog…so much fun stuff!

I can’t wait to show you all the photos she took of Lucy’s birth (along with the birth story)…I’m editing them right now, but can’t make any promises as to when they will be all done There are A LOT! So in the meantime, enjoy these yummy photos…and go check out the entire set here.

Today marks the NINE year anniversary of my commitment to this amazing man. Everyday I am more in awe of how perfectly we are matched to each other and how God has provided for us so abundantly throughout the years. In the past nine years, we have:

• Lived in 11 homes
• Created two little people who look like us
• Traveled the country and experienced a lot of LIFE in a small period of time
• Fallen more deeply in love than ever!

And oh how I love him! Let me count the ways:

I LOVE…

• …how he loves Jesus.
• …his passion for leading others in worship.
• …how he confidently leads our family.
• …how he knows exactly how I like my poached eggs and he has them ready for me in the morning.
• …how he is incredibly handy and can truly fix/create anything!
• …his obsession with Craigslist…and his “researcher” personality.
• …his family (I am a lucky girl to acquire them as my own!)
• …how he looks at his girls.
• …how seriously he takes the role of “Daddy”.
• …that he is a true “outdoors/workin’ man”.
• …his love of movies.
• …that he enjoys going to garage sales and thrift stores with me.
• …listening to him play his guitar.
• …that he requests green smoothies and drinks them with pleasure
• …that he loves to travel.
• …feeling our feet touch in the covers as we fall asleep.
• …how handsome he is! Woo woo!

…and most of all, I love that he LOVES ME!

Thank you Matt for standing by me and loving me unconditionally…I’m looking forward to 50 more years!
Here are a few pics of our special day.

Our little Lucy Mae has arrived!

Lucia Mae Janssen (pronounced loo-CEE-ah)
aka “Lucy”
Born at home into her daddy’s hands
Friday, May 29, 2009 at 2:59pm
8 lbs. 4 oz.
23.5 inches

Labor and birth were perfect and beautiful…I can’t wait to share all the details with you! We are completely in love with her and we’re enjoying every moment of our babymoon. I will post a complete birth story and more photos within a couple of weeks. For now, here are a few photos to tide you over!

“Infinite and yet an infant.
Eternal and yet born of a woman.
Almighty, and yet nursing at a woman’s breast.
Supporting a universe, and yet needing to be carried in a mother’s arms.
Heir of all things, and yet the carpenter’s despised son.”

–Charles Haddon Spurgeon

Thank you Lord for coming to earth to save us. We give you praise and honor your name on this Christmas Day! Here are some photos of our Christmas. It was a day full of laughter and memories…I hope yours was the same!

Love,
Sara

Photo credit: Flickr/shutterbugchik

There have been hundreds and hundreds of books and articles written on the Proverbs 31 woman. Many of us have probably heard those verses too many times to count. However, like any scripture, it must be “chewed” on, meditated upon, and processed over and over so that it can permeate our daily lives. I want to work through some of these verses and share my thoughts on them…and as always, I look forward to hearing yours!

I have heard so many women get frustrated as they read these verses…feeling like they could never live up to the “standard” that is set forth in this passage for a godly woman and mother. But take heart and don’t be discouraged! These are words of encouragement…to uplift and guide you in your journey…not a list of rules. So read on with an open heart and let God speak to you where you need it the most.

Bring Good, Not Harm

v. 11-12
Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value.
She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life.
v. 23
Her husband is respected at the city gate, where he takes his seat among the elders of the land.

In the early days of my marriage, I decided that I would never speak harshly about my husband in the presence of others. Not even in jest. No matter how frustrated or annoyed I might be with a situation, it was between Matt, myself, and God. I didn’t run to my girlfriends, my co-workers, my mom, or the message boards. I spoke directly to Matt about my feelings and also to God. And in 7 years of marriage, we have never had a “fight” that lasted more than a few minutes. We never go to bed angry. I attribute those things largely to the fact that I focus on “bringing him good, not harm”. I don’t talk to others about our home life and let harsh feelings brew and brew all day.

Of course, it goes without saying that if you are in a verbally or physically abusive relationship, you must speak with someone about it. And if you and your spouse cannot get past certain issues, you may need counseling with a third party. But those interventions are very different than speaking with others about him and bringing him “down” in their eyes. Build him up! Help others to see him for the amazing man that he is.

I also want him to be confident in my abilities to run our household whenever he is away. If he knows that he doesn’t have to worry about what is going on at home, then he is free to focus on the other important things in his life.

Shop Wisely

v. 13
She selects wool and flax and works with eager hands.
v. 16
She considers a field and buys it;out of her earnings she plants a vineyard.
v. 18
She sees that her trading is profitable, and her lamp does not go out at night.

In our consumerist society, we are constantly fighting against messages of “buy me!” and “pay later!”. These three verses are each speaking against impulse spending and frivolous purchases and calling us to shop wisely with consideration, eager hands, and resourcefulness. We can apply these verses to our life whether we are grocery shopping, browsing eBay, or trading services. A few ways that we can do this:

• Make a grocery list and menu plan before going to the store.
• Stretch what you have and “make do”.
• Plan ahead.

Rise Early

v. 15
She gets up while it is still night; she provides food for her family and
portions for her women servants.

I’ve posted about this before, but for my own sake, I need to talk about it again. This is something that FEELS almost impossible for me to master. When I was in college, I went through a phase of about 6 months where I was getting up every day at 5:30 a.m. and reading the Word…preparing for the day ahead. It was an amazingly sweet time of fellowship with Christ and I benefited greatly. However, since getting married and having a child, this discipline of getting up early has eluded me. There is just no comparison between having your quiet time in the early morning hours and having it later in the day. It is a battle with my flesh to get up early…especially if I have stayed up late.

This verse doesn’t speak directly about getting up early to pray or meet God, but I am assuming that this is a given. She gets up while it is still night (BEFORE) the rest of her family and feeds HER soul first so she can then feed her family (body and soul).

E.M. Bounds, a pastor who was born in 1835, wrote one of my favorite passages on the discipline to rise early:

 

“A desire for God which cannot break the chains of sleep is a weak thing and will do but little good for God after it has indulged itself fully. The desire for God that keeps so far behind the devil and the world at the beginning of the day will never catch up.

It is not simply the getting up that puts men to the front and makes them captain generals in God’s hosts, but it is the ardent desire which stirs and breaks all self-indulgent chains. But the getting up gives vent, increase, and strength to the desire. If they had lain in bed and indulged themselves, the desire would have been quenched. The desire aroused them and put them on the stretch for God, and this heeding and acting on the call gave their faith its grasp on God and gave to their hearts the sweetest and fullest revelation of God…”

This man is completely amazing. The “chains of sleep”? Oh yes. I can realate. Read more of his thoughts on prayer here. Several other authors have fueled my desire to rise early over the years. Becky Tirabassi, author of Let Prayer Change Your Life (you all must read this!), made a vow to God that she would get up early and pray for one hour every day for the rest of her life. She has an amazing story. Another woman, Laine, is a beautiful woman of God and she writes “letters of encouragement” to other Christian women. She speaks extensively on this topic…in a very convicting fashion!

Jesus modeled getting up early to pray over and over…along with other disciples. This is one of the disciplines I am actively working on in my life right now, and I would love to hear those of you who have “mastered” it! I take comfort in knowing that because it’s something that is God’s will for me and that He will be pleased with, He will not hesitate to answer my cries of “HELP ME GET UP LORD!”.

Work Vigorously

v. 17
She sets about her work vigorously; her arms are strong for her tasks.

The definition of “vigor” is “energetic activity; energy; intensity”. I want to apply this to my life immediately. When it’s time to do dishes, I want to do it with INTENSITY! When it’s time for
laundry, I want to do it with great ENERGY! Not only will it get done faster, but it will be a great workout, which completes the rest of the verse. My arms will be STRONG for my tasks. If I can do housework in a speedy fashion, I will have less need to work out every day because it will come naturally. I like it.

Be Generous To All

v. 20
She opens her arms to the poor and extends hands to the needy.

A generous woman is a beautiful woman…one who is constantly looking to help people. Looking for opportunities to bless others. When it speaks about the “needy”…it doesn’t necessarily mean someone needing money. It could be a friend who just needs a word of encouragement. “Extend your hands” today to someone who needs help…whether it be someone on the street or someone in your family.

Clothe and Take Care of Your Family

v. 21
When it snows, she has no fear for her household; for all of them are clothes in scarlet.

Basically, take care of the needs of your family. Clothe them. Feed them…be prepared FOR them. Make sure there is enough food on hand. Have a plan for the day. If you see clothes that will fit your child next year for 25 cents…buy them. If they are “scarlet”…that’s even better. hee hee…

Be Crafty and Make Your Home a Haven

v. 22
She makes coverings for her bed; she is clothes in fine linen and purple.
v. 24
She makes linen garments and sells them, and supplies the merchants with sashes.

Not everyone is blessed with the desire to “make” things…but I think these verses go beyond just “sewing” and making things. Just the fact that she is making things leads me to believe she is concerned about the “feel” of her home. We are called as wives and women to make our homes inviting, cozy, and wonderful to be in. It’s part of the way we can bless our family and our husband…creating a haven for him to come home to every night.

Laugh At The Future

v. 25
She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come.

Wow. This is one of my favorite verses. To be clothed with strength and dignity is an amazing picture of a Godly woman. Think about the Christian women in your life…I’m sure you can pick out a few that embody this description…I know I can. Even amidst life’s difficult times, they can still LAUGH at the days to come. I recently heard John Piper speak about this verse…and he said that this type of woman is not naive…she KNOWS that there is difficulty ahead, but she can still look to the future with HOPE. Here is an excerpt from his sermon (which you all should go listen to or watch). Powerful stuff:

The deepest root of Christian womanhood mentioned in this text is hope in God. “Holy women who hoped in God.” A Christian woman does not put her hope in her husband, or in getting a husband. She does not put her hope in her looks. She puts her hope in the promises of God. She is described in Proverbs 31:25: “Strength and dignity are her clothing, and she laughs at the time to come.” She laughs at everything the future will bring and might bring, because she hopes in God.

She looks away from the troubles and miseries and obstacles of life that seem to make the future bleak, and she focuses her attention on the sovereign power and love of God who rules in heaven and does on earth whatever he pleases. She knows her Bible, and she knows her theology of the sovereignty of God, and she knows his promise that he will be with her and help her strengthen her no matter what. This is the deep, unshakable root of Christian womanhood. And Peter makes it explicit in verse 5. He is not talking about just any women. He is talking about women with unshakable biblical roots in the sovereign goodness of God—holy women who hope in God.

Speak With Wisdom

v. 26
She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue.

I went to the commentaries for this one…

Matthew Henry: She not only takes prudent measures herself, but gives prudent advice to others. The law of love and kindness is written in the heart, and shows itself in the tongue. John Wesley: She is neither sullenly silent, nor full of impertinent talk, but speaks discreetly and piously, as occasion offers. In her tongue – Her speeches are guided by wisdom and grace, and not by inordinate passions. And this practice is called a law in her tongue, because it is constant and customary, and proceeds from an inward and powerful principle of true wisdom.

The tongue is a powerful thing…especially one wielded by a woman. It’s very easy to use it for harm and not for good. I pray that my words would be full of wisdom and grace, not “impertinent talk”. Every word is counted in heaven…have I said anything today that I would not want to have “counted” by Christ?

Watch Over Your Household and Don’t Be Lazy

v. 27
She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness.

Another great commentary by Matthew Henry: Her heart is full of another world, even when her hands are most busy about this world.

Wow. It is possible to be overwhelmingly busy running your household and still have a heart focused on God. I love the phrase “watches over the affairs of her household”. A woman of God will know what’s going on. She knows when she’s out of dish soap and she does something about it. She knows when her children need her undivided attention…she knows when something needs to be taken care of…she just KNOWS.

Now…for the next part. Eating the bread of idleness. An interesting word play for me…because I LOVE bread. Bread is tasty. Bread smells good. Bread is warm. But too much bread is bad for my body. Just as too much idleness is bad for my household, my spiritual life, and my family. Two other verses come to mind regarding this:

Psalm 90:12
Teach us to number our days aright, that we may gain a heart of wisdom.

Psalm 90:17
May the favor of the Lord our God rest upon us; establish the work of our hands for us…yes, establish the work of our hands.

God wants to help you be productive. He wants to help you effectively “run” your household. He wants to show you HIS plan for your day…but you must let Him. Pray that He will reveal that plan…even if it’s at the expense of YOUR plan.
Be Praised

v.28
Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her.

If you are striving to be a woman of God…focusing on all of things things talked about here…your family should be happy! They will be happy because they will be taken care of, fed and clothed…and the household will be running smoothly. There is no greater joy for me in earthly endeavors than to have Matt praise me for how I am doing as a wife and mother.

Beauty Is Fleeting

v. 30
Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.

We live in a nation obsessed with looks. Hair, nails, clothes…how much time did you spend today making sure that all of that was how you wanted? I hope that we can all spend MORE time with God each day than we do getting ready in the morning. Piper had wonderful words on this from the same sermon that I linked to above:

And this leads to a third feature of Peter’s portrait of womanhood, a focus on internal adornment, rather than external. First Peter 3:5 begins, “This is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves.” This adornment refers back to what is described in verses 3-4:

Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear—but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious.

We know this does not mean that all jewelry and all hair styling is excluded because then all clothing would be excluded as well, because it says, “Don’t let your adorning be external . . . the clothing you wear.” What he means is: Don’t focus your main attention and effort on how you look on the outside; focus it on the beauty that is inside. Exert more effort and be more concerned with inner beauty than outer beauty.

And he is specific in verse 4. When a woman puts her hope in God and not her husband and not in her looks, and when she overcomes fear by the promises of God, this will have an effect on her heart: It will give her an inner tranquility. That’s what Peter means in verse 4 by “the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious.”

I bolded the part that I really like. Our MAIN attention in life should be inner beauty: getting to know who your heavenly father is…learning His will and studying His word. If you can do that, it will transform you from the inside out and will affect much more than just you. It will affect your family, your friends, and everyone you come into contact with.

There is a book that I have been reading consistantly over the years and it has had a profound impact on my views of womanhood and motherhood. It’s called “A Woman After God’s Own Heart” by Elizabeth George. I am going to devote an entire post to this one book because I know that many will benefit from her words. If you’ve ever wondered or struggled with the “submission” part of a Christian marriage, stay tuned In the meantime, I will leave you with a passage from that book called “The Heart of the Homemaker”. My post on the book will go into more depth, but I felt that it coincided well with my desire to be a Proverbs 31 woman:

The Heart of the Homemaker

• I will get up before my family, in order to prepare myself spiritually and physically.
• I will prepare breakfast for my family and sit with them while they eat.
• I will work diligently to send every member of my family off in a good mood.
• I will consult my husband every day to see if there is anything special he wants me to do for him.
• I will keep a neat and orderly home.
• I will respond positively.
• I will meet my husband’s needs.
• I will put my husband before my children.
• I will personally meet and greet each family member as he or she returns home.
• I wlil be predictibly happy.
• I will prepare special, good food for my family.
• I will make dinner a special time.
• I will grow DAILY in the areas of Lord, marriage, family, and homemaking.

She wraps it up by saying…

Is yours the heart of a homemaker? If not, ask God for His transforming touch. As He empowers you to obey, He will give you JOY at the task to which He calls you and enhance the beauty of the tapestry you are weaving.

I’m off to ask God to TRANSFORM me and make me JOYFUL about my alarm clock ringing at 5:00 a.m….wheeeee! Bring on the coffee!

“For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders. And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.”

Isaiah 9:6

It’s been a beautiful Christmas day! We’ve played outside, sat by the fire, and enjoyed family. I love holidays…when the pace slows down to a stand still, even for just one day. Here are some memories from our day.Thank you Jesus for the most amazing gift.